3 years old tomorrow

I simply can't believe my sweet little girl will be 3 tomorrow. As is often the case, my mind is drawn back to her homeland where another Mother was close to giving birth to a child she knew she could never keep. I have some people who say to me, or who assume, that doing this must be easier for families in China because of the 1 child policy. I ask you? how could it be easier. How could you put 'giving up your child' and 'easy' in the once sentence. I don't think that there would be many Mother's on this earth that would find giving their child up easy - not even close. The bond that is formed between a mother and child is an incredible one....look around you. And I think it would be even harder when the reason for giving your child up may well be because of a Government policy. No, I don't know the circumstances of Ebony's birth - I know very, very little in fact - and I don't want to 'romanticize' the event just to make Ebony happy in years to come. She will have to draw her own conclusions. I do believe in my heart of hearts though, the decision would have been a very, very difficult one for her Birth Mother.

I also know that I appreciate that woman more than any words could say.

I look at my sweet, happy little girl who dances around the lounge room, giggles so much and wants cuddles so often and I ponder on what she would have been like in her own environment. I ponder this little girl growing up in China. I'll never get to see that picture - I can only dream of it and send my heart felt prayers to that Mummy in China who I'm sure will be weeping at the thought of a daughter she can't even know the welfare or whereabouts of. I simply can't imagine that feeling - but I love her for her sacrifice and what it has meant to my life these past 20 months.

Today, as I will over the next few days, I do and will shed tears for the events of 3 years ago.