July Video's part 2

You gotta love it when they have no idea you're there! Here's she's attempting to sing the song that goes 'daddy's going to buy you a rocking horse..and if that rocking horse etc.....'


Dancing with her darling friend Eliza...only 24 hours after Eliza was accidentally burned with boiling water on her face - she was just amazing....


Waiting for little 'Amalia' from China to come through the doors at the Airport....

July Video's

Eb's first ever go on ski's.....


Coming down the ski lift at Falls Creek.....


Some 'snow play' before we went home.....

Then little Amalia came home....

Well - we've had our last trip down to Melbourne for quite a while. Actually it should be our last trip period for a while!
The main reason was because our dear friends Tracey and Michael from Portland arrived home this morning with their much longed for and much awaited.....and very beautiful, daughter Amalia. She is so gorgeous.

She is a tiny dot of a girl and Eb was a little enchanted with her. She had presents to give her and she tried to interact, but of course little Amalia was in a very strange environment and she had just had a long flight.

It will be interesting to see the changes when we go to the FCC cultural camp in Sept/Oct.

Amalia seems to be a very placid and sweet child - her face just exemplifies sweetness to me. She is now 2 years and 4 months old - but, of course, her development is naturally well behind that. She seems to be extremely comfortable with Tracey and Michael which is lovely for them and wonderful for Amalia.

It never ceases to amaze me the tenacity of these little children. All they have been through and yet - in the most uncertain of circumstances...they still know how to give a beautiful, warm smile. Welcome home sweet Amalia!

Last Melbourne post for a little while....

It was such a fun weekend. We had the first night in a Motel and although we had a terrible sleep - it was still ok.

Eb and her daddy having some fun moments...


The next morning Graham had to go and do some work at our old home in Montrose so Eb and I went and did a bit of shopping and then went to Mark, Bern and the girls where Daddy met us for lunch. As always, the girls had a ball together!



After that we headed over to Kate, Jim and Eliza's for the night. Poor little Eliza! and her poor, poor Mummy. Last night, Kate arrived home from Uni and decided to have a cuppa. While she was pouring it, little Eliza ran up to her Mummy and grabbed her arm...the one with the boiling kettle in it...and little Eliza ended up with raw boiling water on her face. Luckily Daddy knew to put cold water on it straight away and then they headed into the Royal Childrens Hospital. Poor Eliza has a nasty mark on her face and her Mummy is feeling incredible guilt (although I did remind her that accidents are called that for a reason). I do understand though - and the consequences are all over Eliza's face whenever she looks at her. I must say, Eliza is a little trouper and she was a really, really settled little girl and the two girls played beautifully together!

First attempt at snow ski's @ 3yrs 11 months

Yep! I bit the bullet (and the bank account :)
It was a last minute decision - we went with Susan and Sarah.
The weather has been a bit bizarre this year - plenty of snow - but very little down low. Up the top it's fine though, but you just don't see snow until you're almost at Falls Creek - normally you would see it on the way.

Today Eb is 3 years and 11 months.

It was a TERRIBLE weather day - and that didn't set things up well - but we did it!
We left here about 8am and went and got the girls fitted with ski's and then we (well I) drove up the mountain to Falls Creek. We arrived very close to the 10am start time (rush, rush, rush!). The guy who took our $68 for the lesson .... 2 hours (!!!) said we were really pushing it - but again we decided to go - so we rushed outside only to find the lifts had cues of some 100+ people (and Sarah needed to go to the toilet!)....I waited in line until they returned and then we took the lift up, up, up to Cloud Nine. The weather got worse the higher we went - but I was still in good spirits and so was Eb. I really needed the loo by this stage - but we got the girls booked in (a LONG process the first time) and then we were able to leave them and head to the toilets.

???? kinda ready....maybe....????


I'm not at ALL sure about this!


Getting her ski's on....


They're on!


Susan had promised Sarah she'd be there for her - sadly, Eb was doing really, really well until she saw me...then she ended up with water coming from every conceivable place in her head! She was hysterical. So were a few kids I might add. I really, really encouraged her (the instructor wasn't much good with her I'm afraid) but in the end I had to walk away and Susan took over and it was better (than it would have been if I stayed).

With Susan on the 'magic carpet'



It was a really hard thing to do - but I knew I wasn't doing her any good. She finally got her ski's on and headed off up the 'magic carpet'. She did quite well and finally I was able to 're-appear' and take over. Once again, sadly, they took the children in for a hot drink and Eb didn't cope too well with getting off only to be left again (they wouldn't allow parents in there....but I ended up going just to get Eb settled and happy).

Finally happy with Mummy by her side...


We went back out and Eb was happy to have another go - but Sarah had had enough (I must say, by this time the conditions were shocking and children were just getting blown over!) - so Eb had one more go and then we went in and enjoyed a lovely hot drink before we headed back down the ski lift to the bottom.

On the way back down...


Down the bottom we found a spot where the girls could have some fun play time together - so we ended it on a really good fun note.

A new 'gramps' in the house....

Yep - my darling man because a 'Gramps' in the early hours of this morning.
At 3.14am, at Benalla Hospital, Graham's daughter-in-law Bron gave birth to a beautiful 8lb, 10oz baby girl - Lilybeth Joy Boote. Graham happened to be working at Dan's (his son) on Thursday and low and behold Bron went into labour that night at about 9.30pm. Dan asked if Eb and I would come and visit so we made the 3 hour round trip and we're so glad we did. Little Lilybeth still hadn't had her first bath when these were taken - as a matter of fact she was barely 12 hours old! but she really is a cutie pie! Enjoy....as Iknow we will for years to come :)

Scary, scary nights.....

I've had a few of them actually.
When my brother and his family were here they were all (or had been) sick. We had been doing so well, but the day they left things went down hill. Eb had a terrible night and a high fever which I've not really had to deal with. Having experienced a Febrile Convulsion with her I was very 'on guard' though.
We woke the next morning and she still wasn't herself, but I figured we may as well go to Albury for the day. She coped ok, but was very grizzly.
I had made a Doctors appointment for 4.15pm because she had this strange red rash around her eyes and the pharmacist couldn't work out what it was.
I arrived at the Doctor's and when he saw Eb she had a temp of 39.3 - I was horrified and felt like the worst Mum alive. Eb is so good at not complaining. She had obviously been feeling terrible but just didn't complain much at all.
That night and the next we had really, really terrible nights. She was in a horrible sweat (luckily she was sleeping on a stretcher in our bed because Renee was still here). I was up to her 20+ times each night. I have never had to do this with her before. She has a terrible cough too. I felt like I didn't see a smile for almost a week - and she would have NOTHING to do with anyone but me.
Getting Panadol into this child is one of the hardest and most difficult things as a Mum I've ever had to do. I literally have to hold her down and so does her daddy to get it squirted into her mouth and even then she gags. I don't know that she gets much more than 3ml of the 5 I'm trying to give her. My brother watched us do it one night and he had tears in his eyes just watching her (and my) distress.

One thing that has come out of this week for me though - is just how much she now loves and trusts me.
I have a dear friend whose darling little adopted daughter was placed in her arms on Monday. Sunday night this is what I wrote to her....

"Tonight, as I lay my sick little girl's head on her pillow and tried to calm her exhausted tears my thoughts made their way to you.

Tonight, as has been the case for almost 4 days now, my little cherub has only wanted me....no one else but me.

Tonight, in her disturbed sleep, all she wanted was her mummy to keep gently touching her face and her hair.

Tonight she needed what I could give her.

2.5 years ago the story was very different.

It's taken 2.5 years to get to this point.

Why do I tell you this? I think you know the answer.

What is in store for you tomorrow....and for the days/weeks/months that lay before you.

Your story may be very, very different than ours. But what I want to say more than anything else is .... it is so worth it.

Every fear, every tear that I have cried or felt over the past few years. Tears and fears for how much little girl is doing emotionally - comes to a time like this, when all she wants is her mummy.

You have been a mummy to a little girl before and I know this time will bring with it a certain amount of pain.

Hold on to the truth that you know in your heart.

With precious little children - LOVE WINS."

I ended up posting that same story on our FCC and AAC yahoo sites (both dedicated adoption from China sites) and have had some really touching and beautiful responses....which led me to write this....

"Thanks for everyone's lovely responses!

Fi - what you've written fits EXACTLY into how I feel! Every time I write of how the bonding/attachment is improving on Ebony's website I see another month go and find myself amazed all over again. Maybe you are right that this is a journey that will never really end, but the one really, really wonderful thing is that it just keeps getting better.

I really did have a time when I honestly thought that my little girl was just not a 'cuddly' or 'kissy' girl and my heart ached so much for that reality. She has mostly 'wanted' me - but she would turn her face away if we got 'too close' and she would avoid eye contact. (That was as recently as 4-6 months ago). Now she just wants to be cuddled. She wants me to sit with her, she wants me to play beside her - she wants to hold my face in her hands and smother me with kisses - she wants to pat me and hold me if I hurt myself and asks with her big wide beautiful brown eyes 'you ok mummy - I kiss better for you?'. She just lays in my arms and snuggles whenever she gets a chance. Last night she came up to Graham and I and said '3 cuddle?' which is when we lift her up and the three of us have a cuddle. It was beautiful and brought a tear to both our eyes.

She has come SUCH a long way - and as a mummy I am more grateful than words could say that I have been given the gift of a loving, snugly, kissy girl - no matter how long the wait!

Tracey and all of Batch 27....and the batches still to be allocated. My what a wonderful and rewarding journey this is. Hard at times yes!, but oh, oh so worthwhile!"

So - although it's been painful and hard - I can see the silver lining and, as I have said, I am so grateful for the gift that God has given me in the form of this precious little beautiful girl.

Being a mummy to a sick little girl has shown me just how strong the bond of love that exists between a mother and daughter is - even if she isn't flesh of my flesh.

Eeeeeekkkkkk.....

Head lice!
After my niece came to stay my sister had to call me with the news......my niece had head lice.
Well, there's a first for everything! I've been very careful with kinder - but just wasn't ready for this. So ! treatment. Luckily I had a bottle of treatment 'stuff'. I checked Eb's hair and when I had just about given up and thought there were none - one appeared! I couldn't find any in mine - but decided to give us both 'the treatment'....here's some photo's...might as well make fun out of the situation I say. ....and Eb coped really well :)

Just us!

Finally - (and I don't mean that in a negative sense :) - we are on our own.
I've had so much to do with the B&B (and I've been so sick too) that I just haven't had time to do the things with my little girl that I love to do. So yesterday and today we ventured out to the local park and had some good, fun, mummy daughter time. The days have been so beautiful and any opportunity to get out seems like a good one...especially when we've both been sick! Here are some photo's of our two visits.....

Oh! this is so much fun Mummy!

now I can even stand up!




...the MANY faces of my darling Ebony....

...and more family

This is the end of the long period of 'holidays and family'. My brother Terry arrived on Friday for 2 nights - he took Renee home when he left today.

We had a nice time together, but we were still getting over our sickness, so it sure wasn't as much fun as I had hoped it would be.

I think it was sadness that Renee and I didn't get to do the things that we normally would that was hardest. Although she assures me she has had a ball. Anyway - here's some memories....

A fun pancake morning was had by all.....

Then family arrived....

Friday my brother Mark, his wife Bern and their two gorgeous girls Beccy 6 and Lizzie 4..along with my darling niece Renee (12) arrived. We decided to go to the snow on Saturday because there is a Pete the Dragon show we thought the girls would really enjoy so we donned our gear, hired what needed to be hired and headed off. We had an absolute ball. It makes SUCH a difference when you have the right gear! I was warm as toast. Eb wasn't too keen at first, but it wasn't long before she was in there making snowmen and sliding down slopes. The snow was wonderful. We had dinner up there at the 'Cock 'n Bull' and they were so lovely to us. Poor little Lizzie was the only one not correctly attired (always make sure kids have good warm boots!) so she was freezing by the time we got to the restaurant (snow in her gum boots - no insulation) and they were kind enough to take her pants and sox and give her a snow suit while they dried her clothes for her - they were amazing... and so was the meal. Sadly my brother wasn't too well, but he soldiered on!

We had such a great time in the 5 days they were here. Bern and I got to go for walks and then Bern helped me prepare for the guests that arrived the day they left. It was the best time we've had together for a long, long time. I was very sad to see them go. Thankfully, Renee stayed!

Mostly, Eb and Lizzie played together and then Renee and Beccy - it worked really well. The weather was just totally perfect all round. What a great time!

Eb and Lizzie having breakfast

Renee and Beccy

My brother Mark...no words...sorry!

My SIL Bern - having fun as she always does!

My girl once she'd 'warmed up'

Renee

Snow off one of the roofs

Me and my little girl about to 'slide' down...

Snow fun...

I love this one of Lizzie helping Eb up

My girl

Gorgeous Lizzie

My solomn brother and Eb

One of the resorts at Falls Creek - an outside pool in the snow!

a blurry lens !!

Four beautiful cousins

PJ cousins!

Eb and Lizzie watching playschool together



And then their last morning together....